Lost Time

One of the things that never gets mentioned with depression is lost time; days that it feels impossible to do anything besides be conscious.  Those days that even doing a load of dishes seems terrifyingly overwhelming.

Those days are lost to us.  Those who suffer from depression don’t accomplish anything on our off days.  Work, housework, social obligations pile up making it even more overwhelming on days that we feel decent.  It is a terrible cycle.

What if I had done everything, or at least half, of what I wanted to get done on those days?  I know it is a useless question, but I think that I would be much farther ahead in life.  How would my life be different with those lost days added in?

I just had a couple off days.  Now, I am trying to catch up.  If I had been doing what I should have been these last two days, I could be reading or working on something fun.   Instead, I am making up for spending two days in a zombie-like trance.

I might write a poem about this.

I haven’t decided yet.

What have you felt you’ve lost because of mental illness?


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